Where Have You Been All My Life?

We all know and love those infomercial products we see on QVC, buy during a cookie-dough fueled purchasing marathon, then sometimes regret later. Oh, you don't? That's just me? I, uh, never mind.

Anyway, I used to think that the Snuggie, also known as most amazing product known to man, was the greatest thing available to order on television. C'mon, it's a blanket ... with sleeves!


Not only is the Snuggie warm, it is extremely fashionable. It's like a hospital gown (as it is open in the back) with long sleeves, but made out of fleece. I've also heard rumors you feel like a wizard while wearing one, which is reason enough for me! Yeeeah, reading a book Merlin style, what what!


But, I digress.

People, I am here on this soapbox today to announce the only thing in history to ever one-up the Snuggie. I present ... the Couch Dress.


Dude, screw fleece. Look at the crochet work on this beauty! Mesmerising. Yes, it doesn't have sleeves like that so-five-minutes ago Snuggie, but the Couch Dress is 100% handmade, covers the furniture you're sitting on and can be worn to any occasion. Grocery store? Check. Business meeting? Check. Dinner and drinks with friends? Double check. I can not only guarantee all eyes will be on you while wearing this little number, but no one else will have anything like it. Trendsetter alert! At only $349 for a couture, custom fitted garment masterpiece that is both blanket and dress, you really can't go wrong.

I need one! My next paycheck couldn't get here fast enough. I have the perfect bag and shoes ...