Shut Up, Early Bird

I'm not a morning person. Never have been. Some people apparently find this very offensive and take it personally.

This morning I was walking into the Starbucks near my house for their crack-cocaine house blend because the watered down swill at work just wasn't going to cut it. I go to pull the door open at the exact moment some guy went to pull it as well. We did that awkward 'no, you go ahead' dance with each other for a few seconds until I just went for it again. Surprisingly, we pulled it simultaneously for a second time. I then realized he was playing a game. How? This 40-something year old man peeked through the posters plastered on the door and stuck his tongue out at me, in a 'tee hee hee' sort of way. Like a child. A child that has severely underestimated my decaffeinated patience in the morning. I'm sure he could see how unamused I was (I wasn't hiding my annoyance), so his face fell and he opened the door to leave, breezing past me saying, "some people just don't know how to have fun". What?! That rude little remark made me want to kick him in the shins until he retracted it.

You see, I've been lacking in sleep this entire week. Last night, I took a three hour nap after work and was still tired when I finally went to bed around midnight. Then, the trolley started honking at 2:16 am. Why was the trolley honking? I have no idea. The trolley never honks, even when it's running in the day time. I've barely ever heard more than a little beep from it. Walking to my car this morning I realized all the midnight activity was Oktoberfest being set up in downtown La Mesa, which meant I had to drive around an entire part of town to get on the freeway. I was annoyed before I even got to Starbucks and met my fun-loving friend. I was exhausted. It was 6:30 in the morning. He had already consumed his energy-enhancing beverage, I had not. Hey, rude Starbucks guy, you need to take all of these variables into consideration before claiming I don't know how to do something.

Bottom line - shut up, stupid early bird. I totally know how to have fun. You don't know me! You don't know my life!