So, I haven't spoken to my parents in almost a year. It's a strange thing to not have contact with your immediate family. The weirdest part is that I feel mostly stagnant about the situation ... now.
I've been so hurt by my family over this time, I wouldn't even know how to have a relationship with them if they even tried to contact me now. Still, Mother's Day was an emotional day for me. I don't know why I thought I would hear from a mother who missed her daughter, when mine obviously does not.
I was disappointed from the lack of communication I didn't expect. I feel like an idiot. I like feeling stagnant better.
There's no shame in longing for a stable, healthy relationship with your mom. Even when you know in your mind that the separation from the family is probably helping you avoid a lot of drama and hurt feelings, there's always going to be a part of you that mourns the loss just the same. It's only normal.
ReplyDeleteMiss you. How's the new job?
The new job is okay. It works really well with my school schedule and it's worth working occassional nights and weekends for what I'm getting paid. So, overall - WIN!
ReplyDeleteBunch of crap.
ReplyDelete